God wants me to know....

....that every little part of you is magical.

Yes, even the parts that hurt, even the ones that are feeling disease right now. It's alright to love what is in pain. More than alright, that's exactly where your love is needed the most. So why not touch that part that hurts and smile at it, at yourself through it, and whisper: ''I love you.''

Grabbed this out of a facebook application. Wondering how it makes sense right now...

Careless Whisper by Seether

I feel so unsure
As I take your hand and lead you to the dance floor
As the music dies, something in your eyes
Calls to mind a silver screen and all those sad goodbyes

I'm never gonna dance again
Cause guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

I should have known better than to cheat a friend
And waste the chance that I'd been given
So I'm never gonna dance again
The way I danced with you

Time can never mend
The careless whispers of a good friend
To the heart and mind
Ignorance is kind
And there's no comfort in the truth
Pain is all you'll find

I'm never gonna dance again
Cause guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

I should have known better than to cheat a friend
And waste the chance that I'd been given
So I'm never gonna dance again
The way I danced with you

Tonight the music seems so loud
I wish that we could lose the crowd
Maybe it's better this way
We'd hurt each other with the things we want to say

We could have been so good together
We could have lived this dance forever
But now who's gonna dance with me?
Please stay

I'm never gonna dance again
Cause guilty feet have got no rhythm
Though it's easy to pretend
I know you're not a fool

I should have known better than to cheat a friend
And waste the chance that I'd been given
So I'm never gonna dance again
The way I danced with you

Permanent by David Cook

Is this the moment where I look you in the eye?
Forgive my broken promise that you'll never see me cry
And everything, it will surely change
Even if I tell you I won't go away today

Will you think that you're all alone
When no one's there to hold your hand?
When all you know seems so far away
And everything is temporary, rest your head
I'm permanent

I know he's living in hell every single day
And so I ask, oh God is there some way for me to take his place?
And when they say it's all touch and go
I wish I could make it go away but still you say

Will you think that you're all alone
When no one's there to hold your hand?
When all you know seems so far away
And everything is temporary, rest your head
I'm permanent, I'm permanent

Is this the moment where I look you in the eye?
Forgive my promise that you'll never see me cry

NS

NS is a curse
For all Singaporean Men
Serve it like a man!?

On Life...

Life is short
Much to see and feel
Out of time

Naive

They say I'm Naive
But they believe everything
We are all the same

Crocodile Tears

It isn't my pain.
Crocodile tears are shedding.
Not mine anyway.

The other side of Ben

Without the void, the Light cannot exist...

http://theothersideofben.blogspot.com/

Permission needed so ask if you're really interested......

Geez...its really hard to talk about such deep feelings and emotions.

Lacrimae rerum

"Sunt lacrimae rerum et mentem mortalia tangunt"



"The world is a world of tears, and the burdens of mortality touch the heart."

Why do we pretend to be happy?

Why do we put on disguises to be the person we're not?
Why do we forcefully smile even though we're not happy?
Why do we put on masks?
Why is it so hard to let it all go and just be who you want to be?

Right Here Waiting by Richard Marx

My favourite song ever. Fell in love with it ever since the first time I heard it. Still love it now and probably will continue to love it forever. Come to think of it, this song is probably the only song that has changed the way I looked at life, especially love.

Oceans apart day after day
And I slowly go insane
I hear your voice on the line
But it doesn't stop the pain

If I see you next to never
How can we say forever

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I took for granted, all the times
That I though would last somehow
I hear the laughter, I taste the tears
But I can't get near you now

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me going crazy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

I wonder how we can survive
This romance
But in the end if I'm with you
I'll take the chance

Oh, can't you see it baby
You've got me going crazy

Wherever you go
Whatever you do
I will be right here waiting for you
Whatever it takes
Or how my heart breaks
I will be right here waiting for you

Old Man Cycling

Rusted metal bike
Creaking, cracking porous bones
The old man pedals

"What the Modern Woman Wants" by Chong Wei-Zhen

The old woman sat in the backseat of the magenta convertible as it careened down the highway, clutching tightly to the plastic bag on her lap, afraid it may be kidnapped by the wind. She was not used to such speed, with trembling hands she pulled the seatbelt tighter but was careful not to touch the patent leather seats with her callused fingers, her daughter had warned her not to dirty it, 'Fingerprints show very clearly on white, Ma.'

Her daughter, Bee Choo, was driving and talking on her sleek silver mobile phone using big words the old woman could barely understand. 'Finance' 'Liquidation' 'Assets' 'Investments'... Her voice was crisp and important and had an unfamiliar lilt to it. Her Bee Choo sounded like one of those foreign girls on television. She was speaking in an American accent.

The old lady clucked her tongue in disapproval. 'I absolutely cannot have this. We have to sell!' Her daughter exclaimed agitatedly as she stepped on the accelerator; her perfectly manicured fingernails gripping onto the steering wheel in irritation.

'I can't DEAL with this anymore!' she yelled as she clicked the phone shut and hurled it angrily toward the backseat. The mobile phone hit the old woman on the forehead and nestled soundlessly into her lap. She calmly picked it up and handed it to her daughter.

'Sorry, Ma,' she said, losing the American pretence and switching to Mandarin. 'I have a big client in America. There have been a lot of problems.' The old lady nodded knowingly. Her daughter was big and important.

Bee Choo stared at her mother from the rear view window, wondering what she was thinking. Her mother's wrinkled countenance always carried the same cryptic look.

The phone began to ring again, an artificially cheerful digital tune, which broke the awkward silence. 'Hello, Beatrice! Yes, this is Elaine.' Elaine. The old woman cringed. I didn't name her Elaine. She remembered her daughter telling her, how an English name was very important for 'networking', Chinese ones being easily forgotten.

'Oh no, I can't see you for lunch today. I have to take the ancient relic to the temple for her weird daily prayer ritual.'

Ancient Relic. The old woman understood perfectly it was referring to her. Her daughter always assumed that her mother's silence meant she did not comprehend.

'Yes, I know! My car seats will be reeking of joss sticks!' The old woman pursed her lips tightly, her hands gripping her plastic bag in defence. The car curved smoothly into the temple courtyard. It looked almost garish next to the dull sheen of the ageing temple's roof. The old woman got out of the back seat, and made her unhurried way to the main hall.

Her daughter stepped out of the car in her business suit and stilettos and reapplied her lipstick as she made her brisk way to her mother's side.

'Ma, I'll wait outside. I have an important phone call to make,' she said, not bothering to hide her disgust at the pungent fumes of incense.

The old lady hobbled into the temple hall and lit a joss stick, she knelt down solemnly and whispered her now familiar daily prayer to the Gods.

Thank you God of the Sky, you have given my daughter luck all these years. Everything I prayed for, you have given her. She has everything a young woman in this world could possibly want. She has a big house with a swimming pool, a maid to help her, as she is too clumsy to sew or cook.

Her love life has been blessed; she is engaged to a rich and handsome angmoh man. Her company is now the top financial firm and even men listen to what she says. She lives the perfect life. You have given her everything except happiness. I ask that the gods be merciful to her even if she has lost her roots while reaping the harvest of success.

What you see is not true, she is a filial daughter to me. She gives me a room in her big house and provides well for me. She is rude to me only because I affect her happiness. A young woman does not want to be hindered by her old mother. It is my fault.

The old lady prayed so hard that tears welled up in her eyes. Finally, with her head bowed in reverence she planted the half-burnt joss stick into an urn of smouldering ashes.

She bowed once more. The old woman had been praying for her daughter for thirty-two years. When her stomach was round like a melon, she came to the temple and prayed that it was a son.

Then the time was ripe and the baby slipped out of her womb, bawling and adorable with fat thighs and pink cheeks, but unmistakably, a girl. Her husband had kicked and punched her for producing a useless baby who could not work or carry the family name.

Still, the woman returned to the temple with her new-born girl tied to her waist in a sarong and prayed that her daughter would grow up and have everything she ever wanted. Her husband left her and she prayed that her daughter would never have to depend on a man.

She prayed every day that her daughter would be a great woman, the woman that she, meek and uneducated, could never become. A woman with nenggan; the ability to do anything she set her mind to. A woman who commanded respect in the hearts of men. When she opened her mouth to speak, precious pearls would fall out and men would listen.

She will not be like me, the woman prayed as she watched her daughter grow up and drift away from her, speaking a language she scarcely understood. She watched her daughter transform from a quiet girl, to one who openly defied her, calling her laotu; old-fashioned. She wanted her mother to be 'modern', a word so new there was no Chinese word for it.

Now her daughter was too clever for her and the old woman wondered why she had prayed like that. The gods had been faithful to her persistent prayer, but the wealth and success that poured forth so richly had buried the girl's roots and now she stood, faceless, with no identity, bound to the soil of her ancestors by only a string of origami banknotes.

Her daughter had forgotten her mother's values. Her wants were so ephemeral; that of a modern woman. Power, Wealth, access to the best fashion boutiques, and yet her daughter had not found true happiness. The old woman knew that you could find happiness with much less. When her daughter left the earth everything she had would count for nothing. People would look to her legacy and say that she was a great woman, but she would be forgotten once the wind blows over, like the ashes of burnt paper convertibles and mansions.

The old woman wished she could go back and erase all her big hopes and prayers for her daughter; now she had only one want: That her daughter be happy. She looked out of the temple gate. She saw her daughter speaking on the phone, her brow furrowed with anger and worry. Being at the top is not good, the woman thought, there is only one way to go from there - down.

The old woman carefully unfolded the plastic bag and spread out a packet of beehoon in front of the altar. Her daughter often mocked her for worshipping porcelain Gods. How could she pray to them so faithfully and expect pieces of ceramic to fly to her aid? But her daughter had her own gods too, idols of wealth, success and power that she was enslaved to and worshipped every day of her life.

Every day was a quest for the idols, and the idols she worshipped counted for nothing in eternity. All the wants her daughter had would slowly suck the life out of her and leave her, an empty soulless shell at the altar.

The old lady watched her joss tick. The dull heat had left a teetering grey stem that was on the danger of collapsing. Modern woman nowadays, the old lady sighed in resignation, as she bowed to the east one final time to end her ritual. Modern woman nowadays want so much that they lose their souls and wonder why they cannot find it.

Her joss stick disintegrated into a soft grey powder. She met her daughter outside the temple, the same look of worry and frustration was etched on her daughter's face. An empty expression, as if she was ploughing through the soil of her wants looking for the one thing that would sow the seeds of happiness.

They climbed into the convertible in silence and her daughter drove along the highway, this time not as fast as she had done before.

'Ma,' Bee Choo finally said. 'I don't know how to put this. Mark and I have been talking about it and we plan to move out of the big house. The property market is good now, and we managed to get a buyer willing to pay seven million for it. We decided we'd prefer a cosier penthouse apartment instead. We found a perfect one in Orchard Road. Once we move in to our apartment we plan to get rid of the maid, so we can have more space to ourselves...'

The old woman nodded knowingly. Bee Choo swallowed hard. 'We'd get someone to come in
to do the housework and we can eat out - but once the maid is gone, there won't be anyone to look after you. You will be awfully lonely at home and, besides that, the apartment is rather small. There won't be space. We thought about it for a long time, and we decided the best thing for you is if you moved to a Home. There's one near Hougang - it's a Christian home, a very nice one.'

The old woman did not raise an eyebrow. 'I've been there, the matron is willing to take you in. It's beautiful with gardens and lots of old people to keep you company! I hardly have time for you, you'd be happier there.'

'You'd be happier there, really.' Her daughter repeated as if to affirm herself. This time the old woman had no plastic bag of food offerings to cling tightly to; she bit her lip and fastened her seat belt, as if it would protect her from a daughter who did not want her anymore. She sunk deep into the leather seat, letting her shoulders sag, and her fingers trace the white seat.

'Ma?' her daughter asked, searching the rear view window for her mother. 'Is everything okay?' What had to be done, had to be done. 'Yes,' she said firmly, louder than she intended, 'if it will make you happy,' she added more quietly.

'It's for you, Ma! You'll be happier there. You can move there tomorrow, I already got the maid to pack your things.' Elaine said triumphantly, mentally ticking yet another item off her agenda.

'I knew everything would be fine.'

Elaine smiled widely; she felt liberated. Perhaps getting rid of her mother would make her happier. She had thought about it. It seemed the only hindrance in her pursuit of happiness. She was happy now. She had everything a modern woman ever wanted; Money, Status, Career, Love,Power and now, Freedom, without her mother and her old-fashioned ways to weigh her down...

Yes, she was free. Her phone buzzed urgently, she picked it up and read the message, still beaming from ear to ear. 'Stocks 10% increase!'

Yes, things were definitely beginning to look up for her...

And while searching for the meaning of life in the luminance of her hand phone screen, the old woman in the backseat became invisible, and she did not see the tears.

Me first......

Human Hypocrites
Laugh, Smile, Stab you with a knife
Not unless me first

How do I do without......

The Friday BBQ is nearing and I've been getting requests to bake. Aside from the problem of what to bake and where to store the cake during the BBQ, I am hesitant to bake this time. Not because I am lazy, its expensive or I have no time, but rather, I don't have the heart to do so.

People used to ask me. How do you bake so nice? I don't think I'm a fantastic baker. Self-learning from the internet and having a few recipe books. That's all I have. In fact, I don't recall baking anything more than once. Never repeated any of the stuff I made. Bake once. That's it. Next time try a different recipe. Of course there's room for improvement, since nothing is perfect, but still I would like to try something different everytime. So what's the *secret* behind these delicious cakes or cupcakes? The answer: Love.

Whenever I baked in the past, it was usually for a reason. I always (and I stress, ALWAYS) baked with someone in my mind and heart. We've all heard it before in some variation or another. I never really questioned it until people started asking how did I make it so nice or what sort of secret did I have. Never found the answer until recently. Why recently? Because recently I've emptied my heart. And because of this emptiness, it made me realize how nice it is to have someone in your heart. (Or perhaps it would be better if it was reciprocated. Though I may never find out.)

Yet while I think how nice it is to have someone in your heart, I tend to forget about the negative aspects of it. How miserable and depressed I was. How crazy I was over that person. Its almost the same everytime. But the effects are more severe each time. Sometimes it makes me afraid just to think that I could place someone more important than myself. (That's why I started wearing a ring to remind myself to love myself.) Honestly I don't know if I can bake for Friday or how can I do anything without love.

Passing Afternoon by Iron & Wine

There are times that walk from you like some passing afternoon
Summer warmed the open window of her honeymoon
And she chose a yard to burn but the ground remembers her
Wooden spoons, her children stir her Bougainvillea blooms

There are things that drift away like our endless, numbered days
Autumn blew the quilt right off the perfect bed she made
And she's chosen to believe in the hymns her mother sings
Sunday pulls its children from their piles of fallen leaves

There are sailing ships that pass all our bodies in the grass
Springtime calls her children 'till she let's them go at last
And she's chosen where to be, though she's lost her wedding ring
Somewhere near her misplaced jar of Bougainvillea seeds

There are things we can't recall, blind as night that finds us all
Winter tucks her children in, her fragile china dolls
But my hands remember hers, rolling 'round the shaded ferns
Naked arms, her secrets still like songs I'd never learned

There are names across the sea, only now I do believe
Sometimes, with the windows closed, she'll sit and think of me
But she'll mend his tattered clothes and they'll kiss as if they know
A baby sleeps in all our bones, so scared to be alone

Blind

With only your heart.
Like staring into the sun.
Surely makes us blind.

JHE

Justin Timberlake
Jon confesses to Eugene
Watch on Youtube soon!

L4D

Don't alert the witch
Save molotovs for the tank
Boomer in your face

Embarrassing

Was reading through all the stuff that me and my friends wrote at that time. How on earth did we manage to write such mushy stuff?!

Loving You

By Nicholas Thio

As I gaze into your eyes,
I am entranced by your charm.
Taking your hand in mine,
I feel your warmth rush throughout my body.

I envisage us standing here alone,
In this univserse till the end of time.
Your soul entwines with mine,
As I Love you more with every breath.

As your love intoxicates me.
I feel our hearts beating in unison,
Our love cuts through the darkest of the nights like a beam of sunlight.
So let us keep this bright flame of ours burning,

I feel myself captivated by your love,
As I hold you in my arms and feel your heart close to mine.
Let me love you with all my heart,
or till death do us part.

Secretly Loving You

By Ivory Lim

If we can't be lovers,
Can we still be friends,
I ask myself this question,
Over and over again.
My mind screams yes
But my heart cannot deny,
I still dream that one day
You would again be mine.
I know I am foolish,
but doesn't love make us fools?
Being with you again,
Doesn't mean you will be true.
Confused and upset,
I ask myself just what I should do,
And my heart tells me
To just secretly love you.

For Ben

By Ivory Lim

I know that you've been hurt
And your heart is now in pain.
I know that you're afraid
To fall in love again.
I know that you're lonely
You're hurting alone inside.
I know that you're lost
You've got nowhere to hide.
I know that you're unhappy
You think that no one cares,
But I do want you to know that
If you need me, I'll be there.

Angels

By Ivory Lim

There are times you feel so alone,
There's no one to guide you..you're on your own.
You tried looking around, searching for a friend
But sometimes you don't find one in the end.
Although you've been searching high and low...
But have you tried searching with your heart and soul?

My child, open your eyes and you will see,
Angels who will lift you from your misery.
They are sent from heaven to help and guide us,
Love us, teach us, to stay by our sides, protect us.
They brighten our darkened paths so we can find our way.
Child, an angel's beside you, every minute of the day.

When things go wrong, do not despair.
For your guardian angel is always there.
Lifting you up when ever you fall,
An angel will be there, whenever you call.
So child, don't cry when things don't work out right,
For an angel's constantly by your side.

My First

By Claire Ban

I thought you were my destiny
You were like an angel, so wonderful, so heavenly
I thought you were a godsend from above
A treasure from Cupid, the God of Love
Yet Cruel fate has a way of tricking helpless mankind
I was only a puppet in the hands of Fate
Foolish girl as was, I realized it too late
That what seemed to be the most beautiful memory of my life
Turned out to be moments of grief and strife.
The sweet sweet memories of one's first love
Presented like a rich treasure trove
Like the beautiful summer sunset,
It's beauty was only there for a brief moment.
Yet the darkness came, and no light ever came since.
Long after I was thrown into a period of confusion, hatred, bitterness and sorrow
Waiting for happiness and liberation which will be found tomorrow
Yet tomorrow never seems to come,
As if lurking in the veil of night, hiding away from me.
Oh The bitterness! The anguish!
Ironically all from the moments of life which most I relished.

Why did you lie?

I trusted you,
Whenever I was down.
You always told me what to do,
But why did you lie?

I told you all my secrets,
You consoled me and my heart.
From all the despair and sorrow,
But why did you lie?

The day came I finally knew,
That the one I was searching was you.
I wanted to tell you but I had no courage to,
But why did you lie?

So one day I couldn't help it,
But to tell you the feelings I had for you.
You sounded shock and didn't know what to do,
But why did you lie?

I asked you if your heart belonged to him,
You told me it was a forgotten dream.
My face brightened up in a gleam,
But why did you lie?

I thought of you every day and night,
I couldn't get you out of my sight.
Deep inside I thought I was right,
But why did you lie?

The day came when you had to say,
The fearful truth on that very day.
Before that moment I started to pray,
But why did you lie?

You told me your heart belonged to him,
My heart shattered and tears flowed to the heart's rim.
I hoped that I was experiencing a bad dream,
But why did you lie?

I trusted you with all my heart,
But now my courage is starting to break apart.
For you lied to me from the start,
I want to love you but your heart isn't mine to take.
Your heart is his to care or rip apart.
But all I want to ask is why?
Why did you lie?

Why Did You Go?

I thought that when we met
There was something special
That would keep us together.
Why did you go?

We got along so well
And talked and shared our dreams
Of love and happiness.
Why did you go?

I treated you so special
Each and every day
I did everything for you.
Why did you go?

I told you i loved you
And you told me too
You made my heart smile
Why did you go?

I know i did nothing wrong
To hurt you in any way
For you became my life.
Why did you go?

My days were happy
And filled with love of you
You meant so much to me.
Why did you go?

It all ended so fast
Though you never told me why
It had to be over between us.
Why did you go?

My heart will always treasure
Our special moments together
But ache with your absence.
Why did you go?

Sunshower

Would the sun continue to shine after the rain?
Who would be loving enough to take away this pain?
Even though the storm is now gone,
It has left my soul so forlorn.

A ray of light bursts through the shroud of darkness,
Over the land filled with loneliness.
The rain stops and the land is once again,
Filled with sunshine after the rain.

The dazzling sunlight,
Brings so much hope in life.
So much that I could never imagine as I might,
Setting me free from that nostalgic vice.

The birds start to sing and fly,
Over meadows where clouds used to cry.
Flowers in it begin to bloom,
Chasing away all the sadness and gloom.

But as all good things must come to an end,
The rain suddenly starts to fall again.
Engulfing the land in its darkness,
Leaving me wonder why I loved you with such madness.

Rest Of Time

As I look up into the starry twilight,
Holding you in my arms as we dance in the moonlight.
Never thought I would,
Never thought I could.
Be loving you the way like I should.
Like a gift bestowed upon me,
How in the past did I ever not see.
The only truly one made for me.

Though we are miles apart,
The one thing we share are the beats of our heart.
Beating as one, we are always together,
Through sun, rain, sleet and all other weather.

When I touch you and hold you tight,
Everything in my world is finally right.
Whenever you are near me or holding my hand,
I finally realize and understand.
The most important thing in my life is right before my eyes,
This much I swear,not a single lie.
All these words I'll carry with me till I die.
If you would only let me,if I may dare.
Let me make you happy and I'll always be there.
For you,with you,only you.
Let me love you for the rest of time.

My Heart is Crying

I look out the window on this lonely night,
The blanket of stars in the sky are sparkling bright.
I look again and see the rain falling,
Every raindrop is a tear my heart is crying.

Darkness embraces my lonely heart filled with despair,
Which is desperately trying not to tear.
For you shattered it totally,
With lies you told so truthfully.

I wonder was it just a dream,
A dream so real that it brightened my life with gleam.
So real that I did not see the nightmare behind it,
Not even the stars of this night so brightly lit.

Reminiscence of my love for you I weep,
I don't know if these memories I should keep.
For the scars they made will never heal,
And so the hurt you dealt to me never will

Please tell me what to do,
You broke my heart devoted to you so true.
I don't understand why did you lie,
For now my heart can't help it but to cry.

My Heart

My love for you is strong and deep,
Feelings hidden inside for you I cannot keep.
Now, today I must tell,
That one day for you I fell.

Hour after hour,
Day after day.
I find it easier and easier,
And now can I say.

My heart is as fresh as dew,
Secrets in it I must let you know.
My love for you,
Will always grow.

It is time for you to be aware,
I hope you know I truly care.
Your voice whispers love to my brain,
Especially when you call my name.

Please stop and take a glance,
Give me one true chance.
Though my love seems unknown,
But a word from you and it will be shown.

I know in my heart,
That you are the one.
You can see it in my heart,
and from the thing's I've done.

Always and forever,
You know it's true.
Please Believe me
When I say I love you.

Goodbye

Every night I am dreaming,
I never stopped believing.
That one day we'll still be together,
Over the aisles of time that will bind us forever.

The pain fills my dreams with fears,
Underneath the blanket soaked with tears.
Memories of the past I cannot erase,
Especially the sweet smile on your face.

Why did you leave me in that rain,
Drowning me in that sorrow pain.
Is my life really meant to be,
To accept my destiny fate bestowed on me.

Take away the nightmares and fears from my head,
Let this agony begin to fade.
Release me from bearing another sigh,
Guess its time to say goodbye.

For Ivory

When you stumble along the way,
Just reach out for me and call.
Even though I'm so far away,
I'll be there to catch you from the fall.

When you need a listening ear,
To share all your pain and sorrow.
Whether I'm far or near,
I'll make it a better tomorrow.

If you need to shed some tears,
Just know that I'm always near.
Whenever you're lonely,
I'll be there to make you happy.

Never say you want to die,
When you know you can still try.
Even though the truth is hard to hide,
You know you still want to love deep inside.

If your heart is still kept shut,
And there's nothing else you want to listen to.
Just know that no matter what,
Whatever happens I'll always be there for you.

Can't Stop Loving You

I felt it again.
Something which I thought I had lost forever.
In days of loneliness without it,
In place of it was pain.
No one could say that he has never,
Never experienced love.

The day I met you changed my life,
You made me feel so alive.
I wonder then how could I ever survive?
Without knowing you,
Knowing that you there for me whenever I was down.

You would always be around,
Around to cheer me up.
To be my sunshine,
One that I could never find.

Days have passed for me to realize,
That only you held the key to my buried heart.
I pray everynight that we would never be apart.

All I want to say to you is,
There would be no sunshine without the rain.
To stop loving you puts me in pain.
I Can't.
I love you.

A Wish Upon A Star

The stars are so bright tonight,
Perhaps I will forever remember this night.
When the stars are high above,
As though showering me with your love.

Can you see the fireflies' light?
Couples chasing each other in the air.
Their love for each other like the sun so bright.
But I wonder if you know I really care.

I closed my eyes and wished upon a shooting star.
That wherever you are,
I could be there whenever you needed someone,
And I would be your one and only one.

One star-Brighter than the others.
Two hearts-Beating for each other.
We are so close yet so far,
Can't you see we're under the same starry sky?

Whenever you need me just call out my name,
And I'll just do the same.
It doesn't matter now or later,
Coz I know I'll love you in my lifetime forever.

A Reflection In the Pool

I look into the lake and what do I see?

The lovely dreams we both shared,
The tender love we possessed.
Not a moment too lonely and sad,
While we braved the hardships we were led.

Your reflection suddenly shatters into ripples like my heart had,
The dream is over and the nightmare begins.

The dream is forgotten.
My heart is full of tears.
My mind is tortured beyond recognition.
My body is without a soul.

What else is left of me?
Only memories.
Memories of the love I no longer possess.

今天的太阳不一样

I wrote this essay as part of a chinese essay writing competition in secondary 3. Got 2nd prize for this. There's a second part to this essay which I wrote in the following year that nabbed me the 1st prize. If only I could find it....

上个月，她在电话中对:"我们分手吧!",这话像晴天霹震我的心。

我还记得我和她一次约会已经是一年前的了。还记得当时的我是多么地害怕和紧张，怕她觉得我不英俊而从此不理我。

紧张的我一见到她后，连一个字也说不出来。她实在太美了，有如天上的仙子一样。也许是一见钟情吧,从那天起，我和她那灿烂的爱情故事便开始了。

我们每天晚上都会打电话给对方，在电话里甜言蜜语。我和她的初吻是在戏院里，还记得那部戏就是浪漫悲惨的爱情故事<铁达尼号>。当时我们双眼望着对方，情不自禁地吻了对方。

现在想起来，总让我掉泪。当她说想跟我分手后,我不敢相信自己的耳朵,也希望自己是在做一场梦,一场恶梦。

但是，人总是要面对可恨的事实。我把自己锁在房里,不吃不喝,像个姑娘般地哭泣。我当时觉得下雨时的每一滴雨水宛如我的泪水从我的心里渗出。

我的心好痛,我的心整整两个星期被笼罩在那阴霾的雨中,一点太阳光也没有。我好想了结自己的生命，解除我一切的痛苦。

一天晚上，我梦到我死后的情景:　我的家人在棺木旁哭泣,哭得比我现在的情况还凄惨,而她,却跟她新找的幸福在一起度过人生。我看不下去。我醒了过来。

看了闹钟，清晨五点半，天还没亮。我决定为她写一首诗，以后就把她忘了。

　

<一场梦>

我望进湖里。

我们当时美丽的梦，

我们给对方温柔的爱。

从来不伤心或寂寞，

就这样走了一年。

你的面孔在湖面像我的心一样，碎了。

美梦已过，恶梦开始。

我们的梦已被遗忘，

我的心充满了泪，

被折磨得碎成片片，

我已不是我自己。

我只剩下... ...

剩下记忆

你我爱如潮水的记忆... ...

写完后，我掉了一滴眼泪。

天已亮了，我已经找到了新的自己。

　　　今天的太阳跟平日的不一样... ...

First post....

Needed to find some space to put all my writing stuff. Was lazy to buy a webhosting and a domain name so decided on getting a free one. Early stuff will be all my previous works and those of some of my friends. (Yes...all stuff that we wrote in our Secondary school days.) Later on will slowly add newer stuff whenever I get the inspiration to do so.